What's it worth? The cost of home educating.

A fellow blogger and home educating friend recently wrote a blog post on the economics of home education.  She's far more regular at posting than me and has a much better way with words and clarity of thought onto paper in a logical and thought through manner. I just type my brain onto the computer and leave it up to you lot to figure it all out! But she asked for other's experiences because, as with all things, our experiences are all different.

so, here's our story:

We made a financial move from a two income family, to a one and a half income family, to a one income family over the course of five years. We didn't even consider jumping from two full time incomes to one, overnight and even if we had i don't think we would have been brave enough to do it. Falling pregnant with Bean was a complete surprise and we weren't prepared for any of it so we just took the route commonly travelled and I returned to work part time (two days a week) just four months after he was born. A financial need (or so we thought at the time.) We had already started to talk about home ed and had purposefully placed Bean with a childminder so that he would have a family home environment to be in rather than an institutionalised nursery placement. Grandma also looked after Bean one day a week at our house.

Having a second baby and no grandma meant children at the childminders for two days a week. There wasn't much left in the pot after that but we were considering the commonly felt need to 'keep my foot in the professional door.' The problem being that I was slowly becoming more and more disillusioned with the education system (I was a teacher) and had decided that home education was definitely the route for us. I stuck it out so that we could put aside a few pennies for when the day came that we would take the plunge to one income. We were very fortunate, in that, our childminder was happy to continue having Bean throughout his pre-school years. 

And then, we took the plunge. Expecting Plum we wandered gracefully into full time home ed. And I have given up an income, my professional status, any significant pension, social standing (according to some) and all because we wanted our children to know that learning is not defined by what happens within four walls or what an exam tells you you're worth. All because we wanted our children to be guided along a Godly spiritual path. All because we wanted our children to spend more time in a family, filled with love and encouragement and support, than with strangers. 

There is a cost involved in continuing to work: The childcare; the second car; the work clothes; the social events; secret santa; school supplies and gifts for the children; stickers and charts and prizes and the list goes on. It's that time of year where people are counting the cost of school supplies. And then there's the cost of children going to school: the uniform; PE kit; shoes and plimsolls (there's a school near us where the pupil's have indoor and outdoor shoes!); the name tags on everything; charity collections and Christmas Fayres, donating products and purchasing them back again; teacher's gifts ; school trips and swimming lessons; after school clubs; endless birthday parties; paying premium prices when you want to go out as a family; keeping up with the Jones.' I don't mean to sound like Scrooge  we support our fair share of charities and projects but we choose them, we're not expected to or pressured to give to the charity of someone else's choosing. And I'm sure the financial cost of school goes on. Not forgetting family holiday's during the school holidays, costly.

That's not to say that home ed has no financial cost: there seems to be endless ice creams involved; memberships; fuel for outings; outings; craft resources; toys and books. We source information and experiences and life from friends and magazines and a lot of You Tube and Pinterest and love our local library. We explore the natural world around us and visit museums and places of interest. I'm not sure what the total cost is.  Some of it comes at reduced educational rates, a vast majority of it, I suspect, we would have invested in even if our children were to attend school. 

The considered loss of an income would appear to be the biggest cost but with three smalls, two pre-school age, one of those pre-free-entitlement age, the cost of any child care would swallow a second income, even with a career in education giving school holidays. I marvel at  others who appear to successfully juggle working, childcare pick up and drop off, household tasks, family relations, and more, without a breakdown. Of course, the loss of income does mean, we live in second hand clothes, shop to a budget, have less pairs of shoes than others, we consider more carefully the value of the material items we have and purchase, we have to look after the things we have but at the same time not placing more significance on them than they are worth (people first), we learn new skills and take time to do things ourselves or source expertise from within our community and friends. It's a different way of doing things and looking at life but if there's one thing (and there is more than one thing) that home ed has taught me, it is that there are all sorts of people in this world, living all sorts of lifestyles.

But we must balance this out with all the things we gain: We gain emotional health, stable relationships between siblings, we watch our children grow and learn and develop and know each other well. I don't have to attend a parents evening to know if my child is 'happy' in school and what their interests are in or what their learning atm. Our family time isn't swallowed by homework or shared learning tasks, or me shouting at them to eat breakfast and get dressed (i marvel at mothers who manage to get multiple children up and out of the door by 8.30am) We're able to answer or help them to find the answer to the questions they have and are the ones who are there to console them when they fall. We're there when our children are sick, and they are allowed to be sick for more than five days a year, we're there when they're upset and when they're rejoicing, we're there when they marvel at the scent of a flower or are engrossed in minecraft. The small everyday things that we wouldn't be able share if we were apart for seven hours a day. 

For us, the cost of sending our children to school far outweighs the cost of home educating. We are happy, our children are happy. 

Relax

Wednesday 28th August 2013

We were all up so late today. Pumpkin was up for first at 8am followed by Bean at 9.20am. This woke me and disturbed Plum who feed sleepily for another half an hour so we didn't get up until 10am! 

We had a relaxed morning and Plum and I cleaned some of the outdoor toys which she loved as her interest in water play continues. There was some aqua draw and lego and minecraft. Bean wanted to draw a hopscotch on the patio so we did that and played some games for a while including one made up be Bean. The boys swept the patio and played with the guinea pigs. We had a late lunch and then headed off to see friends.

We spent the afternoon at our friends castle on a hill. Bean was full of exploring and adventuring. They played in the tree house and found new buildings that they went in. They played hide and seek and 'night world', they played pirates and piano and lots of home baked cookies and there was difficulty getting Pumpkin to leave but the lure of a new book and a cookie the car got him there in the end. 

We returned to find that our freezer is well overdue a defrosting and had defrosted the chips, so we had chips for tea (the whole bag!) and wrapped the rest of the stock whilst defrosting the freezer. And this evening we have a family viewing of the Great British Bake Off. This time last year it was just me and Pumpkin who enjoyed viewing it together in the evening. What a difference a year makes. Now all five of us have our evenings together every night. 

Underground, overground

Tuesday 27th August 2013

Last night Bean was awake until later than usual. We found ourselves, mummy, daddy and Bean, playing statues. This is a bit like playing musical stautes but without the music or anymovement. As I stood stock still in the middle of our living room with daddy and Bean I couldn't help wondering quite how ridiculous we looked. Good job the curtains were closed! This game was followed by snakes and ladders, and then uno, which is becoming a family favourite. And all this at Bean's request. It was a lovely evening.

Today we had two friends around to play today. The morning was spent playing minecraft on the ipad and we finally worked out, between the four of us, how to kill zombies (important life skill that is, honestly!*) We also spent some time watching youtube videos of other peoples minecraft worlds which has inspired Bean. This then flowed into three hours of play in the garden, which was turned into 'minecraft world.' The children all built structures and armed them and furnished them using various bits and pieces that they could find, this part took about an hour. After much discussion, they decided that no-one would be zombies but there would be invisible ones instead. The game then proceeded to involve, arranging to visit each other's bases, collecting treasure and mining, sleeping, and fighting  zombies. And as I was surplus to requirements Plum and I sorted laundry and did a lot of cooking.

Lunch time brought about a discussion about the afternoon's plans. I had in mind to take them all out for a walk but they decided that they were happy playing. PLum asked for a sleep and, whilst I was feeding and settling her, the others all moved into the living room and played starwars lego together. Our living room is a lovely cool haven on hot days such as today and they stayed there playing the same game for three more hours.

And who says children can't concerntrate for more than five mins.

It was an odd day as I was really on the outskirsts of most of the games and having preprepared lots of food and spent all day yesterday cleaning, I found myself almost considering the possibility of reading a book. but then Plum woke up.

*I feel i ought to mention that the process of of persevering to find out how to deal with the zombies, especially as it has taken several months, plus the collaboration and trial and error approach, along with the sense of achievement and collective joy at finally working it out, are, in fact, all important life skills, even if actually killing a zombie isn't.

Working Together

Monday 26th August 2013

Today I was wondering if our day would have looked different if we had schooled children in our family. After all, it is August Bank Holiday Monday, presumably a great family day at the end of a three day weekend. I suspect if both daddy and I worked, we might feel the need to spend this precious day together doing something 'family' based. And what a lovely sunny day it would have been, if that's what we had decided to do. But it wasn't.

Along with many other people, today we did jobs around the house. It's not something that we find much time for. In between, family events, visiting family, church goings on, squeezing in the things that need doing every day and the occasional bit of sleep, there isn't much time left. But today we spent the whole day doing a few jobs. Daddy mostly coated the wooden items in our garden with protective wood gloss. And I cleaned the house from top to bottom, a combination of feeling extremely motivated, a sunny day to contribute towards my general disposition and having daddy at home too. 

So what did the smalls do all day? Why, they helped, of course. Not because we made them but because they offered and wanted to. The boys especially enjoyed helping daddy paint the wood, dusting with mummy, hoovering (Bean), making a cake and shelling broad beans for dinner (Pumpkin), and cleaning out the guinea pigs. The truth is we would have done far less if they hadn't been helping out.

And in between all this there was minecraft (Bean), playing on cbeebies (Pumpkin), requesting a sleep mid-afternoon (Plum), lego, looking at comic books, snacking, playing with guinea pigs, running around the garden, building hot wheels tracks and a bath at the end of the day to scrub of the paint splatters.  And that's just the things I can remember! 

Turn around

Friday 22nd August 2013

Today began with a host of minecraft and Pink Panther cartoons. The boys have been enjoying a range of cartoons that are silent (as in, no/few words) with musical soundtracks but the Pink Panther has been the most frequently viewed.

We had a long play with the guinea pigs, Alex and Charlie, and Alex has begun to make a wheek wheek sound when we're around, which according to our research, is a good thing. I also found a wooden house that my dad gave the boys, I think possible his dad made it for him. Well now it is a guinea pig house and it has windows which has worked out really well because we can still see them when they are seeking warmth and snugly safety.

We went to our first ever Not Back To School Picnic today. We caught up with loads of friends who we have been topping and tailing holidays with all summer and others who have been hibernating from the school crowds on holidays. It was a great choice of venue. The play area had loads of space and lots of varied equipment plus a green area for riding bikes and running races and hanging out in when we first arrived as there were a lot of families there, both known and unknown. Plum disappeared except for when she wanted some food and was particularly enjoying the tunnel.

It was hot and the boys had been playing and running around in the sun for some time, I had been sitting in the shade. Bean was the first to ask to go home, he hung on in there for maybe half an hour longer before he was insistent that we went home. He rested in the car, we weren't allowed music or talking! When we got home both boys lay on the sofa in the cool of our living room whilst I fed Plum  thinking that she would go back to sleep, but she didn't.

Soon after this, friends of ours came to play and stayed for tea. The boys disappeared upstairs whilst Plum and her friend played downstairs and in the garden. We introduced them to Alex and Charlie, who dutifully (and understandably) hid and just as we said goodbye to them, daddy arrived home early from work, yippee.

And this evening has seen a trip to co-op for eggs and milk, baths and hair washes for the smalls, cake making for me, stories and milk feeds and cuddles whilst going to sleep, blogging and a cup of tea whilst watching Bob the Builder with the boys.

You can go your own way

Thursday 22nd August 2013

Home ed @ home. We took a much needed day at home today (really should have done it yesterday) and realised that we haven't had a day purely us at home for months. It was the most tranquil pleasantly free flowing day. The boys watched various cartoons and played on cbeebies and minecraft on and off throughout the day at their leisure. We fed and cuddled and cleaned out the guinea pigs, Alex and Charlie, this morning. The guniea pigs are beginning to be more confident with us around and happily played in their run whilst Bean and then Pumpkin and then Plum took turns to sit in with them. They are making happy guinea pig noises now too. 

Bean helped me pick produce from the garden and watered in the greenhouse. Plum helped too. 

There was lego building and acting out made up stories. Bean continues to be keen to learn to read so we whipped through some phonics and the read a book of his choice together, spotting some sight words and blending some cvc words. i think he knows more than he's letting on but he's so excited to be doing it, it's lovely. 

Pumpkin found a foam monster kit that i picked up in a sale and put in the craft boxes. For the first time he wanted me to help him copy one from the picture on the packet (not normally our style) but it didn't last long and he was soon creating his own, much improved, monsters. 

I spent a lot of time baking and preserving the garden produce. Pumpkin was watching 'Sarah and Duck' on cbeebies and asked if he could make chocolate bread like Sarah. I think he was rather surprised when I said yes and produced a recipe. Not surprised because we would normally say no but because he didn't really think it was a real thing you could do, just something funny in the story. So this afternoon, Pumpkin and I have mixed, kneaded, proved, knocked back, proved and baked a chocolate loaf. I was thinking we would take it to our first 'not back to school picnic' tomorrow but i suspect it will be gone before this evening is out, it smells so good.

Plum has largely spent her day playing with the water from the paddling pool, pouring and transporting it and paddling in it with her wellies on. And lying down next to the guinea pig run. beautiful. Except when she requested a sleep and a milk feed. She took my hand and walked me upstairs, clearly wanted to get into our bed but just laughed when she got there and saw all the piles of laundry on it. I moved the clothes and she got up and sat on the bed until i was finished and then lay down and asked for milk. i can catergorically say that neither of the boys ever did this, even now Bean will never admit to being tired until he's eyes are closing and Pumpkin will still say he's hungry rather than tired. 

p.s I was wrong. We won't be eating the chocolate bread tonight as everyone else is asleep!

You can't catch me

Monday 19th August 2013

Today I was reflecting on how much more relaxed our Monday's are now we don't do gymnastics anymore. I can start the week off by doing a few chores and so don't fall behind at the first hurdle! 

We got the guniea pigs out and gave them a cuddle this morning, both are still very nervous but they did manage to find the ramp out of their hutch and into the run and put up with an extra two smalls running around the garden for most of the day.

We had two friends around to play today. They spent most of the day playing football related games, IT and Stuck-in-the-mud. I walked them to the park and we bought tickets for the circus. Pumpkin is still undecided as to whether he wants to come or not, we'll see. The park was just a change of venue for the football games but the walk there took about 40 minutes and then back again. We also attempted to feed the ducks but they were obviously fed up (in both sense of the word) and didn't even show an appearance. We managed to drop the football in the pond too which caused Pumpkin to be upset and he chose to come home. It was a slow journey home and Pumpkin was tired but we took it as slow as he needed too and the smalls (all four of them helped and encouraged him on his way. Plum finally fell asleep. 

They all sat down and built with lego for a while when we arrived home. I disappeared upstairs and settled Plum who then slept for another hour and a half. This was followed by 20 minutes watching Father Christmas and then back into the garden for more football/ Pumpkin stayed indoors and fell asleep on the sofa for 2 hours. During this time daddy arrived home and, after eating, we went to play with the guinea pigs. This turned into an extended period of time trying to catch them. I got in the run with them and they seemed happy to run all over me but wouldn't let me catch them. Plum is always keen to hold them first and has got used to the idea that others will have a go too, which helps, as she no longer screams when the boys have a turn.

Pumpkin woke up whilst we were all upstairs bathing and reading (and mummy closing her eyes on her bed for five minutes) He requested some food and Plum can and ate a second portion of dinner. And now the boys are watching Popeye and Plum is having energetic nursery rhymes with daddy.